I seem to forget sometimes that there is no way I can be in complete control of my life. I can only manage it the best way I know how. In my life I have traveled through many different seasons, some were good some were bad. I am always aware of when a season ends, and it makes me excited for a couple of different reasons. I know that whatever I was going through is now over (sometimes this is not a happy thing like returning home from a wonderful summer with fosterclub) and that there is a new season on the horizon. I try to take some time in between the seasons to reflect and try to analyze what just happened. What did it all mean? What did I learn? What are the things I did correctly and what did I do incorrectly?
Here at FosterClub we call this 'debriefing.' After each day at a conference we sit down with the staff and we debrief about the day. We see what worked & what didn't, what we did correctly and what we could improve on. We see what the next day looks like and then we prepare for it.
I have found this technique incredibly powerful to practice in my personal life. I am constantly challenged with ordering my personal and private world. I want to be able to react to each situation in the best possible way without overreacting or under reacting. I have been doing a lot of journalism on the computer, poetry writing and I write in a spiritual journal almost every night before I go to bed. I find that with the physical act of writing or typing it allows my brain to process the events in my life in order for them to stick to this screen or in a book. This helps me clear my head and keeps me focus on what is important in life and what is not. What is helpful and harmful and most of all it develops my interpersonal communication with myself. It helps me feel secure and builds confidence that I am doing the correct things and I am on the right path. It also helps me stay on that path and create both short term and long term goals.
What I have learned most about the season in life right now which is in its final phases is that I was doing a lot of things that were not healthy for me. I learned the 'wrong' way for me to live my life. Which is good in a sense because as long as I don't do what I was doing, I should in theory be on a correct path, or at least a better path. (I hope that made sense).
What I did forget however, that in midst of change it will be difficult. With many things up in the air for a while in my life, I forgot one of the fundamental laws of physics; gravity. What goes up must come down. Now I cannot control how fast or how far things go up in life but I can manage their fall and where they fall back into place. The journey up and down is pretty scary because well times of turbulence is not a time I enjoy. I like to be in control. But I also understand that I cannot control everything and I will be only able to manage myself and my actions the best way I know how.
I guess what I am trying to say is that the more I worried about the past or the future I got lost in both and was not able to enjoy the present moment. If we lose the moment it can never be retrieved because the past is frozen, and I cannot control the future, I can only manage and pray to move in the correct direction. Therefore if I live a life of thought either in past or future, I lose the precious moments in present, and that my friends, is where memories are made.